In the brotherhood, we show love through insults and blatant shades; and it tends to affect how we relate with ladies. Especially those we genuinely love and care for. Throwing shades and bars among the brothers is our way of communicating, diffusing tension or even starting conversations. For ladies, it's a bit nuanced, and we're gentle in our approach.
When I hit your forehead - softly of course, it's my way of saying I love you, stay safe, I wish you all the best. When I pick up and hold your hand - especially with 2 of mine, there's a special place in my heart for you. When I crack your knuckles, it's a sign that I really value you and our relationship. I can be your yakubu sef.
I can't tell you that I love you, but when I call you fish, you're getting there. Your big head? Almost there. Rat? You've reached. I can't express those emotions in words, but subconsciously, these are how I've realised that I show emotion - love as I'd want to term it. I
Guys generally try to impress other ladies and put up a show when we meet them. We have to be at our best behaviour, or risk spoiling our brand. But the more we get comfortable with you, and around you, the more we let go.
While a lady would let her guard down for you, we lift our shades up. So just as a lady would tend to open up to you more to connect with you, these subtle shades are our way of letting you in. The more shades you receive from us, the deeper the connection we feel for you. Unscientific, but true.
"Your English bad oh" when you make a small ignorable spelling mistake = you speak excellent English. We're just showing appreciation. "You're short" = we think you're cute. I mention your full name? Bro. You're up there in the stars.
But of course, as we learn from the brotherhood, there's a mutual sense of respect in those shades. These shades are not meant to demean you, and a guy who insults you is not one of us. He's a sister - one of you. I've said what I've said.
So just pause a bit on your search for guys who consistently sweep you off your feet. What you're looking for is a performance - illegitimate by all standards, made up. We give vibes, but it's not a daily occurrence. On a regular day, we'd shade you any day, anytime, any how cos truly, that's how we show love.
Good evening Ghana.
