As a sofoba, there's one word that never departs from your mouths, and thats Faith. True, your parent might have been called, but you're an epitome of that call too. Born, raised and meant to embody that call; to live it.
You constantly hear your parent preach about "Faith", from Hebrews 11:1, as the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen. And you're inspired, like okay.
Yet the play always be the floor.
For example, how do you marry the concept of Jehovah Jireh, the great provider you had heard your parent preach at church on Sunday, when you're being sacked from school early Monday morning. This leaves you in utter confusion. Ji what? The great huh?
But then you have no choice, so you learn to live by faith. Not knowing where the next breakthrough will come from. You grow to appreciate Matthew 6:28-33 that if God clothes the lilies with beauty and splendour, how much more will he clothe you.
Yet, at a point, you start to crave a normal life just like your friends at school. You start to beg baba God that walahi, you get faith pass Abraham. You want to just have your needs fulfilled without the pensiveness in-between. Like... can I just have this without having to worry a second, especially when I really need it?
But guess what? It doesn't happen. Because God relates with you on a just-in-time basis. Sometimes, He comes through. On other days, though, hmmm. It just feels like like He dey care for lilies pas you sef.
And so this adds up to several reasons to form the basis of your transition into agnosticism. You start to believe that maybe, just maybe, there's a God. But maybe again that God doesn't necessarily apply to you.
Yet, you still attend church though. How can a sofoba say he won't attend church? For the where? You' serve in the church alright, but before God and man, the church isn't in you.
The COVID comes and boy, some of the men of God you so love and trust disappoint you big time with their utterances. The scientist in you cannot marry the apparent connection between 5G and COVID. But that's not all.
A man of God sees your hard botos as fresh meat, and attempts a move. OH EMM GEE!!! Can this man be serving the same God my parents have so sworn their lives to serving? What is wrong with them?
Buttt, you meet a group of sworn atheists. And as you engage, you start to see the light. The more they try to prove the non existence of God, the more you see God. It's inexplicable.
By Grace and probably through your parents prayers again, you start to reconcile the fact that, yes. He might be the "just-in-time" God to you, but no He's never failed you. Not once. Those times you felt he wasn't there? He was. Really was.
And that you were just going through the process like a raw palm but to become the abɛnkwan everyone so craves and desires. The abɛnkwan isn't cooked yet, but you become proof that herh God dey.
And even if you no make am in the end? God still dey, and that's all that matters. 🫶🏾
